Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Should we bail out Big Popcorn?


My friend Don has the best description of the financial crisis going on in an easy-to-read way right here but the real question is: How is it going to affect me and my popcorn consumption? Have you priced popcorn lately? Not movie popcorn. My ARPM (adjustable rate popcorn mortgage) ballooned and burst when I saw Batman a few weeks ago and scared the whole theater! I got Flabbie Mac to give me a loan so I got the large tub with extra butter. (He said I could afford it!) Anyway, movie popcorn has always been expensive but have you priced regular popcorn lately? Through the roof! My wife and I made a popcorn investment the other day at WalMart (or, "the walmarts" as the rednecks say in my neighborhood. ie; I gotta go to the walmarts to get some new camo for church sunday!). We purchased a box of microwave popcorn and some stove top popcorn and 2 containers of shakeable butter and nacho flavoring. $174! Or something like that. Sent our whole household economy into a tailspin. I blame Willie Nelson. Stupid Biodiesel.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

you forgot the whole cancer aspect of your purchase!
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,295761,00.html

dt

Anonymous said...

In the [paraphrased] words of a recent 'Jaywalking' contestant, you've gotta imagine Wilbur and Orville Redenbacher are turning over in their graves.

And maybe John Lennon was trying to make the same point, when he sang "Instant Caramel's gonna get you!"

No word on what Kernel Sanders thoughts might be.

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Willie has tried to press the oils out of the, uh, seeds leftover from his favorite pasttime. Nearly all seeds have some natural oil - grapeseed, sesame seed, cottonseed. Willie could be a pretty major contributor, I'm sure, and then, instead of smelling like a Whopper when you're driving behind his bus, it'd smell like you're sitting in the nose-bleed section of the Tarrant County Convention Center during a Grateful Dead concert. Or something like that...

An' then, maybe with all the trucks running up and down the highway near Brenham - the cows would line up near the fence an' get all mellow and such, and mellow ice cream comes from mellow cows. Really puts a new perspective on 'highway', huh?

On the other hand, if Ben & Jerry won't listen to PETA, maybe Blue Bell will.

I'm tellin' ya, me an' Dew could run the milking operation...